Awkward little me

I sometimes feel weird and out of place. Like I don't really belong. It has always been hard for me to really connect with people. I am friendly, most of the time, but to really call someone a close friend takes a while and I am not always the best at keeping it up. I will go to the ends of the earth for those I call friends. But getting to that point is painful and angst-ridden. I feel like I am a little too different, I say the wrong things, I act the wrong way. It has always been like this for me but I have found that in recent years it has become worse. I think it started when I first moved away from my hometown and then got worse when I moved to working from home. Allowed the excuse to stay at home all the time, I could hide from public and not deal with people and those feelings of awkwardness. Now that I have a child and find myself living again away from my hometown I have found these feelings renewed. I feel like I have to go out in public and give my child some social interaction. I also crave it a little myself. Away from anyone I know and feel comfortable with, I am lonely. But again I find myself feeling awkward, questioning my every word and action, unable to really connect with people. I know most of my "followers" at this point know me and I don't say this for any other reason than getting it off my chest in the hopes of making myself better for it.